Wednesday, April 22, 2009

survey says...?

So, just to take a broad survey of the three people who read this blog:

When you see people you hate, do you pretend to like them?

a) Yes.
b) Yes, and I usually overcompensate by being super friendly.
c) No, I just ignore them.
d) No, I am blatantly mean to them.


I ask because there is this woman I went to grad school with, whom I had a terrible horrible no good very bad experience with on set once, and every time I see her I sort of try to ignore her, but she comes over to me and makes a big show of kissing me on the cheek and talking to me when I would really rather she just ignore me too. I am 98% sure that she, like me, continues to hold a grudge against me-- things were pretty sore between us for a long time. But when she acts all nice and oh-everything's-fine-nothing-bad-ever-happened, I feel like I am the bad guy. Don't get me wrong, when she does it I do it too, because to just ignore her after she's being fake happy at me would be downright inhuman, but... it's just strange. I think secretly she does it so that I feel guilty. If that's true, it's working, and I don't even really know what I feel guilty about.

What a manipulative bitch!

Has this ever happened to anyone else?

2 comments:

  1. yeah, but not exactly the same situation. like, i'll still feel awkward around a person that i've had a falling-out with in the past...but then they act like nothing happened. so then i wonder - do they really think it's not a big deal? or forgot about it? or was i blowing it out of proportion? then usually i think about what happened and determine that no, no proportion-blowing has occurred so i'm just left confused and very cautions around the person.

    but for people i really don't like - there are only a couple actual people i know that fall into this category - and usually i go with unstated option e) be minimally civil so as not to be rude, and that's as far as it goes.

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  2. Oy. Story of my life, you should know that by now. I just end up being very uncomfortable, stony and awkward. And I can't make eye contact or small talk with people I hate or have had fights with, it's a reflex. I just make mute weird half smiles when they're trying to be funny and I don't care and don't think they're funny.

    I REALLY hate it when they pretend like nothing ever happened, it makes me more mad. It's like they're saying whatever happened wasn't that big of a deal when CLEARLY it is because hello! I STILL hate you!

    Not that I feel this way about anybody in particular.

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